(I work in a Coffee Shop. I was on break in the lobby when a couple walks in. Directly behind them is a cute little boy in Batman costume.)
Me: “Oh my God! It’s BATMAN!”
(The boy stops, strikes a pose and starts looking around menacingly. After a few seconds, he approaches the counter.)
Mother: “Jeff, would you like a chocolate milk?”
Boy: “I am not Jeff. I am The Batman.”
Mother: “The Batman, would you like a chocolate milk?”
Boy: “Yes. Yes, The Batman would.”
(The couple pays while the boy sits down with his chocolate milk. He keeps a stern look on his face as he sips the drink.)
Boy: *sips* “Gotham is safe.”
stupidstagram: stupidstagram: when i was a freshman in high school for the senior prank they took all the desks/chairs out of the school and shaped huge penis on the soccer field with them. U THINK IM JOKING
f-fuckface: infinity-on—high: shouldntbesoproud: No….. Just fucking no… the fuck?
friend: *whispering* if you're stupid say "what"
friend: OH MAN
OH DEAR FUCKING CHRIST
I GOT YOU SO GOOD, THAT WAS AWESOME
SWEET, SWEET DICKS IN MY MOUTH. I HAVE NEVER LAUGHED THIS HARD. EVER.
JESUS. JESUS HELP ME.
vandalium: uncannibal: epitomeofgreatness: The video for the gif that’s been going around all day. tHE GUY HOLDING THE CAMERA HIS FUCKIGN LAUGH AND THEN HEFALLS THE FUCK DOWN OH MY GOD JESUS DICKS IM FRICKGIN omg.